January 2012
8 posts
such strangeness: i think about getting lit up by... →
tremulously:
i think about getting lit up by light. i think about light splashing and then staying still. i think about light, filtered through different things. two eyes. a blanket. the blinds. through fingers.
the days are different kinds of cold. some days have cold fingers that creep through your clothes…
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maybe if i knew where u lived i would take a bus to see you and i probably would because i have nothing except i might have sixty bucks today maybe (not even a place to live just a boyfriend)
toescurledunder asked: text me
November 2011
7 posts
i wish
i could control
the change in
me that makes me
switch
“why are you alone” why am i not alone how am i not alone i mean when at times i lose my mind so entirely that i am crazy enough to be not me psychotic but i am not trying to push you away thank you (you stayed)
life of the drug addict
September 2011
1 post
i feel embraced by goldness (the feelings i have are like this) the sun is inside me or maybe i am finally happy
July 2011
1 post
June 2011
81 posts
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tuesday i am turning twenty all grown up emotions still stayed though
what NDS roms should i download i am depressed and lonely you can answer here :)
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(i do not know what it is about you that closes
and opens;only something in me understands
the voice of your eyes is deeper than all roses)
things which i cannot touch because they are too near
turning older, getting colder
tangelus:
I am never returned what I’ve given. I have grown to expect Inaccuracy Illegitimate attempts Causing spaced out and Hollow Interactions I have no mood Plans with plan-less fixations I’ll stand and listen to the crowd
sitting here looking at millions of photos of myself hmm i don’t know what to blog about so i will just tell the truth
today all i could think about, how consuming, were my own feelings and whether or not they are supposed to be there. i don’t really know how to explain this to anyone but today i had to try. having to wonder if you’re happy or sad or hurt or angry because of...
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you always get mad because i am sad, i am always sad
you make me sad i make you angry
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“every morning the maple leaves.
every morning another chapter where the hero...”
– richard siken (via g-dawgg)
tremulously:
“At least I have the flowers of myself, and my thoughts, no god can take that; I have the fervour of myself for a presence and my own spirit for light; and my spirit with its loss knows this; though small against the black, small against the formless rocks, hell must break before I am lost; before I am lost, hell must open like a red rose for the dead to pass.”
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at the hospital everyone complained about gaining weight except for me. i guess i ate two spoonfuls of food a day and became light enough to feel pushed by the wind whenever i’d walk outside to light a cigarette. i remember making my way back from the corner of the road to the automatic doors, inside to the elevators and how everything would seem so pale and i would close my eyes and lean...